This post just came across my Facebook news feed; I offer it as a playful reminder that, while we here at Spiritual Friendship talk about sexuality a lot, there’s more to life than being gay! The nature of this website means that sexuality and “allied fields” are mostly what we talk about here, but there’s much more out there! Those who denounce us for calling ourselves gay or queer or what have you are over-making their case, certainly; but there is a certain basic truth that underlies their argument. It is true that our fundamental identity must come from Christ; it’s just that Christ is not the only name by which we may call ourselves.
With that being said, gay is just one word that describes Stephen Lovegrove. Attraction to guys is just one characteristic that describes me. And my sexual orientation is a very small part of my multi-faceted, complicated, and spectacular life. So I write today to say, there’s more to life than being gay.
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Jesus told us to pray that life would be on earth as it is in Heaven. He even took it a step further and invited us to join Him in bringing the kingdom way of life to earth. If we’re going to do that, we have to start viewing people through the lens of the kingdom. We have to view people through an eternal perspective.
Here’s a few labels that come from the culture of the kingdom:
Lost and found. Kingdom of light vs. kingdom of darkness. Dead or alive.
Child of God. Worth dying for. Declared righteous. Holy and set apart. Accepted. Loved. Chosen.
Do you get the point? These identities matter because they last forever. These identities didn’t originate within humankind; they came from our Creator. And they’re the ones that matter.
All that to say, I will still tell you without flinching that I’m gay. I’ll admit to liking boys and even tell you which member of One Direction is the cutest. But I will not find my identity and centre my life around being gay.
I’m not saying you can’t be an individual. Embrace who you are – your gender, sexual orientation, age, hometown, political views, likes and dislikes, interests, hobbies, personality type, quirks, etc.
But find your identity in something that lasts forever. Because your soul will.
Spiritual Friendship 
Awesome words…thanks for sharing this, Josh. I wish folks from both sides of the divide would heed this…and that I myself would, as well.
You say these other identities matter because they last forever and didn’t originate within humankind. Do you mean to say that your being gay did not originate with the creator and is therefore of lesser consequence? I know there won’t be marriage in heaven and all that, but that need not mean that straight people should cease describing themselves as straight.
Mmm…as someone in a “straight” marriage who identifies as “queer” I would have to say that identity involves this, but, as Josh points out, transcends it. I think ultimately we are made for communion with all: the communion of Saints who are both male and female. Queerness is kind of a reminder that marriage is only the half of it.
Queerness is a reminder of the supremacy of heterosexual marriage??
Thank you. May God extend your reach.